Hello decmeber 31, 2011.... The last year of existence, the year before a crucial presidential campaign, the year where every villain and thei mother died, the year where powerful countries have saw doomsday....
Let tonight be LEDEN.... wait for it .. DARY !!
Friday, December 30, 2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
Christmas in China... Round 2... oh wait.. ROund 3
I forgot I was here for Christmas 2009, the same couple of months that I was convinced to move to china the following summer after graduation.
I always tend to plan big holiday events quite some time before the actual holiday. Most of the time it pays off, and things happen the way I want them to.. but there are also last minute events that changed the outcome.
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 3 months before:
- Big dinner with turkey, hosted by me, and invite all my close friends... which at the time wasn't that many. It just turned Fall and many have left during the summer, and their return date was unknown.
- Secret Santa with my Favorites
- Have Stockings stuffed with treats for everyone
- Purchase a gift for that special someone back in NY because it's much cheaper there
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 2 month before:
- Still the big dinner with contributions from Giulia's amazing italian cooking skills, Luika's awesome baking talents and Ting's taste in cheese and dips :-P
- Purchase Holiday decorations and Hats for everyone.. now the friend count has probably quadrupled
- hide and destroy that present I bought... maybe save it for may
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 1 weeks and 3 days before before:
- Get away from Shanghai, Go to HK or Harbin or Korea
- Found out everyone was going home for christmas and spending it in shanghai alone is too depressing.
- Fell in love with the song Cold December Night by Michael Buble. There's a line in it "Don't want to be alone tonight". Maybe that stick to me a bit hard
- Awesome Brunch @ the Westin for Steven's birthday
- Still did the Stockings, instead they were the 50 Santa hats I ordered from Taobao, and cookies. For my office
- Told Giulia to hide the present, May wont happen
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 1 week before:
- still host a big party but no food involved. We made a huge Shabbat dinner before Asher left so we were tired from all the cooking and baking
- The HUGE party didn't happen, there was a miscommunication with me and my friend Dave, who kindly lend us his apartment. Apparently they might get kicked out of their apartment if it gets too rowdy. We ended up have about 20 people over and just drank mulled wine, had some illegal substance, and watched TV... and passed out for a bit before heading home at 5:30am.
- The Brunch still happened without Steven because he decided to stay in the South. It was absolutely one of my favorite brunches.. just madness at the Westin and for some reason.. probably because this is CHINA and you can get away with murder if you smile and bow, we managed to get through without any fines or noise complaints
What I thought I was going to do for Christmas 3 days before:
- Joining Tink on his Christmas Bike Crawl
- Partying it up with Patricia at Zeal
What I actually did for Christmas:
- Got convinced by Dad to go to Beijing
- All the western restaurants were either booked or they were charging 4000 rmb per head, so we had Hotpot... Duck Soup, close to a turkey but still not Turkey
- Hung out with Wei wei and his gf for the Day, picking out our Christmas Gifts.. I know.. really traditional right...
- Met up with some old BLCU buddies in Sanlitun
- Went Sunday Service and watched children sing... and thought, "I can't wait to make my kids do that"
I guess Christmas didn't turn out as I expected it to be. Someone always told me I had too many expectations (UPDATE: the Indian guy from across the hall told me not to have high expectations for anything...) Maybe it's because I prefer to have things perfect when the time comes. Why my strive for perfection is so strong sometimes, I wish I knew the answer. All related to my emotional personality I guess. Maybe I just want something out of the storybook but never seemed to get it.
I envy how everyone gets to go home and celebrate with their family and relatives. And having a decorated tree filled with presents underneath. Some of them even had the opportunity to have a white christmas and stuffed stockings. I smile at their lives and wish I can be a part of it.
Then, there are moment where I'm glad I'm here. Some people wish that they can travel around the way I do, being in a foreign country, enjoying things out of the norm.
Regardless it's christmas, I made the best of it, and ignored the anger and sadness that I felt arising occasionally. I promise my future children that they will get the tree by the fireplace where the stockings hang filled with trinkets and treats.
Merry Christmas
I always tend to plan big holiday events quite some time before the actual holiday. Most of the time it pays off, and things happen the way I want them to.. but there are also last minute events that changed the outcome.
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 3 months before:
- Big dinner with turkey, hosted by me, and invite all my close friends... which at the time wasn't that many. It just turned Fall and many have left during the summer, and their return date was unknown.
- Secret Santa with my Favorites
- Have Stockings stuffed with treats for everyone
- Purchase a gift for that special someone back in NY because it's much cheaper there
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 2 month before:
- Still the big dinner with contributions from Giulia's amazing italian cooking skills, Luika's awesome baking talents and Ting's taste in cheese and dips :-P
- Purchase Holiday decorations and Hats for everyone.. now the friend count has probably quadrupled
- hide and destroy that present I bought... maybe save it for may
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 1 weeks and 3 days before before:
- Get away from Shanghai, Go to HK or Harbin or Korea
- Found out everyone was going home for christmas and spending it in shanghai alone is too depressing.
- Fell in love with the song Cold December Night by Michael Buble. There's a line in it "Don't want to be alone tonight". Maybe that stick to me a bit hard
- Awesome Brunch @ the Westin for Steven's birthday
- Still did the Stockings, instead they were the 50 Santa hats I ordered from Taobao, and cookies. For my office
- Told Giulia to hide the present, May wont happen
What I thought I was going to do this Christmas 1 week before:
- still host a big party but no food involved. We made a huge Shabbat dinner before Asher left so we were tired from all the cooking and baking
- The HUGE party didn't happen, there was a miscommunication with me and my friend Dave, who kindly lend us his apartment. Apparently they might get kicked out of their apartment if it gets too rowdy. We ended up have about 20 people over and just drank mulled wine, had some illegal substance, and watched TV... and passed out for a bit before heading home at 5:30am.
- The Brunch still happened without Steven because he decided to stay in the South. It was absolutely one of my favorite brunches.. just madness at the Westin and for some reason.. probably because this is CHINA and you can get away with murder if you smile and bow, we managed to get through without any fines or noise complaints
What I thought I was going to do for Christmas 3 days before:
- Joining Tink on his Christmas Bike Crawl
- Partying it up with Patricia at Zeal
What I actually did for Christmas:
- Got convinced by Dad to go to Beijing
- All the western restaurants were either booked or they were charging 4000 rmb per head, so we had Hotpot... Duck Soup, close to a turkey but still not Turkey
- Hung out with Wei wei and his gf for the Day, picking out our Christmas Gifts.. I know.. really traditional right...
- Met up with some old BLCU buddies in Sanlitun
- Went Sunday Service and watched children sing... and thought, "I can't wait to make my kids do that"
I guess Christmas didn't turn out as I expected it to be. Someone always told me I had too many expectations (UPDATE: the Indian guy from across the hall told me not to have high expectations for anything...) Maybe it's because I prefer to have things perfect when the time comes. Why my strive for perfection is so strong sometimes, I wish I knew the answer. All related to my emotional personality I guess. Maybe I just want something out of the storybook but never seemed to get it.
I envy how everyone gets to go home and celebrate with their family and relatives. And having a decorated tree filled with presents underneath. Some of them even had the opportunity to have a white christmas and stuffed stockings. I smile at their lives and wish I can be a part of it.
Then, there are moment where I'm glad I'm here. Some people wish that they can travel around the way I do, being in a foreign country, enjoying things out of the norm.
Regardless it's christmas, I made the best of it, and ignored the anger and sadness that I felt arising occasionally. I promise my future children that they will get the tree by the fireplace where the stockings hang filled with trinkets and treats.
Merry Christmas
Sunday, December 18, 2011
“In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people’s home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!”
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
you know what's hard..?
when you're talking to your friends about their problems and there, you slowly remember all the problems that you have forgotten about. The little things that went wrong, and then it all built up.. And then you realize how much everything hurts again
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Great Example of Chinglish
"[5:24:37 PM] Nelson Ferrett: haha i just got an email from a Chinese dude that can't speak english
[5:24:51 PM] Nelson Ferrett: i was thanking him for dinner last friday night
[5:25:13 PM] Nelson Ferrett: and he wrote...'we all friends, by yourself people'
[5:25:32 PM] Nelson Ferrett: ive been trying to figure out all day what he meant by 'by yourself people'
[5:25:41 PM] Nelson Ferrett: and it finally lclicked
[5:25:47 PM] Nelson Ferrett: zhi ji ren "
LoL
[5:24:51 PM] Nelson Ferrett: i was thanking him for dinner last friday night
[5:25:13 PM] Nelson Ferrett: and he wrote...'we all friends, by yourself people'
[5:25:32 PM] Nelson Ferrett: ive been trying to figure out all day what he meant by 'by yourself people'
[5:25:41 PM] Nelson Ferrett: and it finally lclicked
[5:25:47 PM] Nelson Ferrett: zhi ji ren "
LoL
Monday, December 5, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
How TO Experience Life
I Got this from another blog:
Experience. Dream. Risk. Close your eyes and jump. Enjoy the freefall. Choose exhilaration over comfort. Choose magic over predictability. Choose potential over safety. Wake up to the magic of everyday life. Make friends with your intuition. Trust your gut. Discover the beauty of uncertainty. Know yourself fully before you make promises to another. Make millions of mistakes so that you will know how to choose what you really need. Know when to hold on and when to let go. Love hard and often and without reservation. Seek knowledge. Open yourself to possibility. Keep your heart open, your head high and your spirit free. Embrace your darkness along with your light. Be wrong every once in a while, and don’t be afraid to admit it. Awaken to the brilliance in ordinary moments. Tell the truth about yourself no matter what the cost. Own your reality without apology. See goodness in the world. Be Bold. Be Fierce. Be Grateful. Be Wild, Crazy and Gloriously Free. Be You.
Experience. Dream. Risk. Close your eyes and jump. Enjoy the freefall. Choose exhilaration over comfort. Choose magic over predictability. Choose potential over safety. Wake up to the magic of everyday life. Make friends with your intuition. Trust your gut. Discover the beauty of uncertainty. Know yourself fully before you make promises to another. Make millions of mistakes so that you will know how to choose what you really need. Know when to hold on and when to let go. Love hard and often and without reservation. Seek knowledge. Open yourself to possibility. Keep your heart open, your head high and your spirit free. Embrace your darkness along with your light. Be wrong every once in a while, and don’t be afraid to admit it. Awaken to the brilliance in ordinary moments. Tell the truth about yourself no matter what the cost. Own your reality without apology. See goodness in the world. Be Bold. Be Fierce. Be Grateful. Be Wild, Crazy and Gloriously Free. Be You.
Monday, November 28, 2011
There's life after me???
No...
I refuse to believe that anyone can have a life without me... Or at least a good one..
I refuse to believe that anyone can have a life without me... Or at least a good one..
Sunday, November 13, 2011
ROCKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
This darn dog is named Rocky, he's the pet of a friend of mine. He had some issues with his apartment so I decided to look after him for a little bit. The first day I brought him home, he pooped and peed everywhere, and on the second day he pooped and peed everywhere again! And so on... It's only been a week and I feel like I've become the master of cleaning dog poop and piss.. So if anyone wants to hire me for 1000 an hour, I'll come over and clean after your dog.
He also sheds... And sheds... Omg non stopping shedding. OH not to mention how he chewed up Luika's pumps and blackberry charger, and my sandals, multiple iPhone chargers and worst of all... Our internet cable... Twice...
The other day, I received a message from my roommate telling me how our living roommate is like destroyed... This is right after I was telling the owner of the dog about how good rocky has been this past weekend. So I get home, prepared with cleaning supplies and a buddy to help, to find that it wasn't as bad as I thought. I assumed poop on the couch and piss on the tv. Luika was already home and she covered some of the damages that rocky made by ripping our tissue box apart...
Oh dog... Such a little brat.... Who LOVES human interaction just a bit too much. He loves to follow you around where ever you go, even the bathroom, and then he regrets it when he's locked in there with you for ten minutes.
[ a couple of weeks later...]
Butttttttt he's been there, through those times when I just wanted to be alone, but he "tells" me no.... Everytime. And instead of angering me more, he runs and jumps on the couch, just to snuggle his nose in my arms. That's it, no more angering me with his annoying playful bites and his desire to be pet. He just lays there and accompanies me when I felt like the whole world couldn't understand what I was going through. 'Alone' was something I never liked, the word itself scares me and makes me use all the muscles on my face to frown. Sometimes I trick myself into believing that being alone is the best, the best for my friends so they aren't brought down by my bummer mood. But dog knows better...
Now I go home, and there's no more urine and poop to clean up, no broken wires to fix, no teared up tissues all over the apartment, I am so grateful for that... Thanks Gary for taking him away!!! But gosh I miss that little pup that could distinguish my tears of sadness from tears of laughter.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
you never know how much you've missed something, someone until it's goneeee
That's how I feel about New York. I miss this city so much.
Even though I was forced to leave here, I didn't know how great this place and how much it meant to me until now.. after I've returned after a year and 3 months.
Here resides democracy, diversity (mostly food.. for me), walkable routes, bright lights that never dies, most convenient subway system in the world, and most importantly the people that mean the world to me!
I'm lucky.. oh so lucky... for everyone to come together to celebrate my short return... Thanks for driving hours to see me, and making time in your busy day. I've seen how much you've all grown and I've never been proud...
Ahh New York, you have everything I love
Even though I was forced to leave here, I didn't know how great this place and how much it meant to me until now.. after I've returned after a year and 3 months.
Here resides democracy, diversity (mostly food.. for me), walkable routes, bright lights that never dies, most convenient subway system in the world, and most importantly the people that mean the world to me!
I'm lucky.. oh so lucky... for everyone to come together to celebrate my short return... Thanks for driving hours to see me, and making time in your busy day. I've seen how much you've all grown and I've never been proud...
Ahh New York, you have everything I love
Thursday, September 29, 2011
I'm in AMERICA!
I'm currently stuck in the DEtroit airport.. waiting for the next flight to NYC.. since mine got canceled...
But still.. I"M SO EXCITED THAT IM HERE, and the first thing I ate was Wendy's.. and I ordered a.. WAIT FOR IT... SMALL SODa (free refills).. Small = large China.. AND DIET PEPSI
At customs: the instructional video is epically dumbed down.. and every race was represented in it
Waiting online: People said.. oopsy, sorry there.. excuse me for a minute... (WHAT?!)
At the shop: Kettle Chips, Haribos, Magazines are normal prices, 5-hour-energy DRINK, ETC.. need i say more.. i can't stop eating and im soo full..
Life: Diversity.. it's just so much better.. your spectrum of good looking people is definitely broader!
I can't wait to get into NYC, Tonight I'm grabbing dins with my parents and BFF Leyna.
Can't wait for this weekend when I see all my lovers <3
But still.. I"M SO EXCITED THAT IM HERE, and the first thing I ate was Wendy's.. and I ordered a.. WAIT FOR IT... SMALL SODa (free refills).. Small = large China.. AND DIET PEPSI
At customs: the instructional video is epically dumbed down.. and every race was represented in it
Waiting online: People said.. oopsy, sorry there.. excuse me for a minute... (WHAT?!)
At the shop: Kettle Chips, Haribos, Magazines are normal prices, 5-hour-energy DRINK, ETC.. need i say more.. i can't stop eating and im soo full..
Life: Diversity.. it's just so much better.. your spectrum of good looking people is definitely broader!
I can't wait to get into NYC, Tonight I'm grabbing dins with my parents and BFF Leyna.
Can't wait for this weekend when I see all my lovers <3
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Ahhh.. how to deal with that...
When you feel happy... Share it with the world
When you feel sad... Hide it from the world
When you feel lonely... Go out and talk to the world
When you don't get the comfort you want and need from someone... find the only person in the world that will give you that...
When you feel sad... Hide it from the world
When you feel lonely... Go out and talk to the world
When you don't get the comfort you want and need from someone... find the only person in the world that will give you that...
Monday, September 5, 2011
So she said I'm selfish!!
... well if your mom said it, then it must be true...
Once Upon a Time, I knew a guy that would say to me, You get mad at me all the time... Scratch that.. I think I knew about 10 guys like that... So Who's the root of all evil?! --> insert answer
You know how when things really bother you at the the moment it happens... make you so angry and bitter at the world and the people around you... seem/feel so small the minute it passes? It tends to happen a lot more to those people who are considered "emotional".
Fact: I am emotional.
If you have asked anyone around me, and anyone that knows me well enough, I am just a rollercoaster of emotions. One minute I can be running around union square because I just saw the newest Harry Potter Trailer (.. now no more.. :-(... ) and then some random guy comes and pisses me off, I'll sit on those steps and ponder...and ponder... and wonder some more.. what a douche that person is....TOTAL MOOD KILLER.
Annddd All I want is the person closest to me at the moment to make me feel better... Is that selfish? Maybe.. if it's at the expense of their time, their happiness, their money, their capability to handle pressure.... then maybe.. actually.. yes I am.
Mom said I can be the most giving person, the most understanding person in the world when it comes to everything BUT emotions... With that, I am like Gollem... Just wanting it the way I want it... My precious.
and 'Sorry' can only go so far. Honestly.. when I say it with a gentle voice (yes im gay..) I mean it x 1000000000^infinity. Trust me, making someone feel bad actually makes me feel so much worse... oh so much worse... And then I'll sit there thinking how I screwed it up so badly.. How can I say those things.. How can I be so inconsiderate... Gosh Why Am I such a horrible person?
Obviously over-thinking really does no good, it can actually make things worse, especially if they are still near you. My new tactic is to just walk away and then deal with it when everything cools down. But I can't seem to master that skill by doing it 'swiftly'. Which in turn pisses off everyone... FAIL is my life.
What can I do?
Now that I'm back to my normal state of mind after an emotionally unstable two weeks.. let me sort my issues out. (please...if you would like to add)
1) Stop being Emotionally Selfish.. I know how.. but honest HOW.. I dont know.. How can i guarantee it?? to be determined.....
2) Find back the confidence I left in the Huangpu River.. GO FOr it.. tAKE A leap of Faith!
3) &*^!(*@&^#(!@&^$!(&@^#(!@&#
4) Grow the fuck up... (this might take a while...)
5) take care of myself (physically)
6) APOLOGIZE- Sorry, désolé, 御免なさい, Lo siento, het spijt me, Assif, Mi dispiace, 对不起... in whatever language they can understand... Even though sometimes it's not ur fault... For peace.. always apologize.
Anyways.. just be Happy and Smile.. a Smile can go a long way..
cause there will always be people that will always love you for who you are
Once Upon a Time, I knew a guy that would say to me, You get mad at me all the time... Scratch that.. I think I knew about 10 guys like that... So Who's the root of all evil?! --> insert answer
You know how when things really bother you at the the moment it happens... make you so angry and bitter at the world and the people around you... seem/feel so small the minute it passes? It tends to happen a lot more to those people who are considered "emotional".
Fact: I am emotional.
If you have asked anyone around me, and anyone that knows me well enough, I am just a rollercoaster of emotions. One minute I can be running around union square because I just saw the newest Harry Potter Trailer (.. now no more.. :-(... ) and then some random guy comes and pisses me off, I'll sit on those steps and ponder...and ponder... and wonder some more.. what a douche that person is....TOTAL MOOD KILLER.
Annddd All I want is the person closest to me at the moment to make me feel better... Is that selfish? Maybe.. if it's at the expense of their time, their happiness, their money, their capability to handle pressure.... then maybe.. actually.. yes I am.
Mom said I can be the most giving person, the most understanding person in the world when it comes to everything BUT emotions... With that, I am like Gollem... Just wanting it the way I want it... My precious.
and 'Sorry' can only go so far. Honestly.. when I say it with a gentle voice (yes im gay..) I mean it x 1000000000^infinity. Trust me, making someone feel bad actually makes me feel so much worse... oh so much worse... And then I'll sit there thinking how I screwed it up so badly.. How can I say those things.. How can I be so inconsiderate... Gosh Why Am I such a horrible person?
Obviously over-thinking really does no good, it can actually make things worse, especially if they are still near you. My new tactic is to just walk away and then deal with it when everything cools down. But I can't seem to master that skill by doing it 'swiftly'. Which in turn pisses off everyone... FAIL is my life.
What can I do?
Now that I'm back to my normal state of mind after an emotionally unstable two weeks.. let me sort my issues out. (please...if you would like to add)
1) Stop being Emotionally Selfish.. I know how.. but honest HOW.. I dont know.. How can i guarantee it?? to be determined.....
2) Find back the confidence I left in the Huangpu River.. GO FOr it.. tAKE A leap of Faith!
3) &*^!(*@&^#(!@&^$!(&@^#(!@&#
4) Grow the fuck up... (this might take a while...)
5) take care of myself (physically)
6) APOLOGIZE- Sorry, désolé, 御免なさい, Lo siento, het spijt me, Assif, Mi dispiace, 对不起... in whatever language they can understand... Even though sometimes it's not ur fault... For peace.. always apologize.
Anyways.. just be Happy and Smile.. a Smile can go a long way..
cause there will always be people that will always love you for who you are
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Morning adventure in shanghai!!
This morning, after sleeping for well over 14 hrs last night, I decided to go on a trek that many are scared of. I went biking around shanghai. I realized that I have been spending wayyyy too much money on cabs in this city...
And what a productive and great morning it was....
Hello bike! Found it after I thought someone stole it...
Getting some air!
Got some wall decorations from this lovely shop on Shaanxi Lu! Leyna, you'd love this place
Decided to stop at the office.. Had to pick up some receipts! And found Eric there...
At the fabric market, making more dresses :)
What a cat....
My roomate being really really Chinese.... On the street
And what a productive and great morning it was....
Hello bike! Found it after I thought someone stole it...
Getting some air!
Got some wall decorations from this lovely shop on Shaanxi Lu! Leyna, you'd love this place
Decided to stop at the office.. Had to pick up some receipts! And found Eric there...
At the fabric market, making more dresses :)
What a cat....
My roomate being really really Chinese.... On the street
Friday, August 12, 2011
I'm a Bitch....
Yes I agree.. I've been a HUGE bitch this past week... due to the stress.. and the exhaustion and sickness.
And I apologize who the person who had to put up with it... hmm I hate that feeling especially when I have no idea why and how it occurs..
DIE EMOTIONS DIE!
.... I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
when you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numbed, I'm revived
can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way
And I apologize who the person who had to put up with it... hmm I hate that feeling especially when I have no idea why and how it occurs..
DIE EMOTIONS DIE!
.... I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
when you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numbed, I'm revived
can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way
Monday, August 8, 2011
Getting IVs are no fun...
... So kids, take care of yourselves and don't get infections!!!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away!
Monday, August 1, 2011
Dear Mosquitos.....
....and your illegitimate offsprings and the inevitable survival of your disgusting larva,
I hope you perish in the flaming depth of Mordor, and forever decease in existence... Please just die and disappear from my world, even at the cost of the extinction of cute little coqui frogs....
I hope you perish in the flaming depth of Mordor, and forever decease in existence... Please just die and disappear from my world, even at the cost of the extinction of cute little coqui frogs....
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
These past few weeks would've been perfect....
..if most of my friends aren't leaving... :-(
This time, people are leaving me, and the feeling is quite comparable to leaving people, i guess...
I'm getting wrapped up in my own rollercoaster of emotions and hormones and caffeine and pot and etc... JUST KIDDING MOM!... but anyways, This past sunday during an insane night out with some crazy british people who will probably end up ruling england one day with their intelligence and wittiness, I looked around me and pretty much knocked about 4 people off the list of friends in Shanghai.. They will now be friends in England and in the US. That's just Sunday alone, this past couple of weeks, people are leaving one by one. This makes sense since it's the end of the school year for many people that were studying Chinese here. IT's just unfortunate that they were some of the closest people to me.
So I'm sitting there, looking at each and every one of these international friends, and I'm remembering some of the great, funny, ridiculous, triumphing moments we have had in the last 6 months. It's actually not a very long time since i've known these people.. and most of them less than 6 months. But the length of time is insignificant when you're attracted to someone like glue and spend all your nights out with them. Especially in SHanghai, when you're an expat, and all you have are each other to hold on to.
This whole weekend I have been feeling really down, from the partying, hormones, boys, girls, etcc.... JUST KIDDING AGAIN MOM... But then today, one of my best friends visited me here at work and for some reason my mood just did a whole 180. I started remembering the mayhem we would cause in the office when she was still here, and how easy it is to just blab every little detail of my life to her and have her either tell me I'm crazy or "well.. wait and see... maybe it's really not that bad". And I hella sure will miss that. Who's going to put me in my place when I'm acting out again... Who's going mentally slap me... i wished sometimes physically slap me, when i'm being retarded? ahhhhh
So now I'm sitting here stuffing my face with almonds and staring at my Douchebag Citation notepad ( hehehe), thinking life has always been fair to me, even though I can be a little bitch and complain about big things, little things, things that don't exist, for allowing me to meet all of these people. As short as the times were, the impact is stronger than the gravitational force of all the planets combined. I don't know how I can express myself or what can I give to these people to match what they have given me, I can only say thank you.. thank you so much for being there when I'm hitting a bottom that never needed to be hit. See you Soon :-)
This time, people are leaving me, and the feeling is quite comparable to leaving people, i guess...
I'm getting wrapped up in my own rollercoaster of emotions and hormones and caffeine and pot and etc... JUST KIDDING MOM!... but anyways, This past sunday during an insane night out with some crazy british people who will probably end up ruling england one day with their intelligence and wittiness, I looked around me and pretty much knocked about 4 people off the list of friends in Shanghai.. They will now be friends in England and in the US. That's just Sunday alone, this past couple of weeks, people are leaving one by one. This makes sense since it's the end of the school year for many people that were studying Chinese here. IT's just unfortunate that they were some of the closest people to me.
So I'm sitting there, looking at each and every one of these international friends, and I'm remembering some of the great, funny, ridiculous, triumphing moments we have had in the last 6 months. It's actually not a very long time since i've known these people.. and most of them less than 6 months. But the length of time is insignificant when you're attracted to someone like glue and spend all your nights out with them. Especially in SHanghai, when you're an expat, and all you have are each other to hold on to.
This whole weekend I have been feeling really down, from the partying, hormones, boys, girls, etcc.... JUST KIDDING AGAIN MOM... But then today, one of my best friends visited me here at work and for some reason my mood just did a whole 180. I started remembering the mayhem we would cause in the office when she was still here, and how easy it is to just blab every little detail of my life to her and have her either tell me I'm crazy or "well.. wait and see... maybe it's really not that bad". And I hella sure will miss that. Who's going to put me in my place when I'm acting out again... Who's going mentally slap me... i wished sometimes physically slap me, when i'm being retarded? ahhhhh
So now I'm sitting here stuffing my face with almonds and staring at my Douchebag Citation notepad ( hehehe), thinking life has always been fair to me, even though I can be a little bitch and complain about big things, little things, things that don't exist, for allowing me to meet all of these people. As short as the times were, the impact is stronger than the gravitational force of all the planets combined. I don't know how I can express myself or what can I give to these people to match what they have given me, I can only say thank you.. thank you so much for being there when I'm hitting a bottom that never needed to be hit. See you Soon :-)
Location:Shanghai
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
:(
Baby please don't go... You got me begging please don't go...
Hell....
Tiffany
Giula
Zinan
Paul
Tim
Alex
Nyima
Matt
Rainer
Luika
.....
Don't go!
Hell....
Tiffany
Giula
Zinan
Paul
Tim
Alex
Nyima
Matt
Rainer
Luika
.....
Don't go!
Sunday, May 29, 2011
DEAD
Okay, I admit... going out till then early morning is getting difficult. I need to get my hormone levels checked... HOW AM I aging so fastttt?
Whatever happened to forever young?
Whatever happened to forever young?
Monday, May 23, 2011
VPN
What is going on with the VPN access in china?
I swear it's a scheme to raise the ren ren stocks.....
Damn censorship
I swear it's a scheme to raise the ren ren stocks.....
Damn censorship
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Thursday, May 12, 2011
I did NOTHING productive today.. so far
... I'm bored... really bored.. so bored that I even dropped to the level of spamming my friends' walls on facebook...that's what happens when your boss is sick, ahh I wouldn't mind making him chicken soup and any other delightful snacks. To be Honest, I'd do anything he want; order flowers, buy almonds, fix iphone (all these have been requested).. etc.. I guess my respect and fascination of him will probably.. most likely, never die.
Sooo this is the month where my future is being decided! I'm waiting to hear back from AEG LA to see if they are accepting me as a fulltime employee. It's quite complicated because of the whole Visa issue... much harder than having a local passport.. Who would've knew that 15 years ago, i'd come back to china. I'm putting a lot of hopes into this... and I'm so glad I have so many people backing me up in the process.. :-)
forr short-term satisfaction Deadmau5 FRIDAY
Sooo this is the month where my future is being decided! I'm waiting to hear back from AEG LA to see if they are accepting me as a fulltime employee. It's quite complicated because of the whole Visa issue... much harder than having a local passport.. Who would've knew that 15 years ago, i'd come back to china. I'm putting a lot of hopes into this... and I'm so glad I have so many people backing me up in the process.. :-)
forr short-term satisfaction Deadmau5 FRIDAY
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
?????
If I can't hear you, then I won't know what you're thinking
If I can't hear you, then I won't know what you are saying
If I can't hear you, then you can't say, I've told you this before
If I can't hear you, then I won't laugh at your stories
If I can't hear you, then I'll forget you
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
Factor that up my cool points....
There are somethings I noticed everytime I am out in Shanghai....and these things actually make people take a second look at me, change their first impression, and become even more friendly than before...
Factor 1: I grew up in New York... To the chinese, growing up in a foreign country represents intelligence and class.. I suddenly become more interesting to talk to once they find out the location of my upbringing. SO here I thank my mother for raising me in New York
Factor 2: I can't write chinese....... This has more of a negative tone to it... I usually get 'Chinese is so important', 'Oh you weren't taught when you were younger?'.... hmph... but to compensate for the slightly condescending sentences, I get...''But you speak so well, that's what matters'.
Factor 3: My stepfather is Italian and we have family in Italy... This headline usually breaks many ice surfaces. We go on talking about the Italian people, the freshness of the food, the cobblestone streets, mountain top cities, quality of the small vineyards, the sun of tuscany... oh gosh.. the list goes on and on... thanks John!
Factor 4: 'This is Danny's daughter'.... Never in my life did I imagine diameter of my father's social circle. Although now he is at the brink of turning 50, he's still known on Shanghai Tang..... AND Sanya.. AND beijing.. and im pretty sure Kumin.. I just have to get there to find out how easy life will get once they know my father's name. I guess this is just an example of the whole 'Guan Xi (connections)'.
Factor 1: I grew up in New York... To the chinese, growing up in a foreign country represents intelligence and class.. I suddenly become more interesting to talk to once they find out the location of my upbringing. SO here I thank my mother for raising me in New York
Factor 2: I can't write chinese....... This has more of a negative tone to it... I usually get 'Chinese is so important', 'Oh you weren't taught when you were younger?'.... hmph... but to compensate for the slightly condescending sentences, I get...''But you speak so well, that's what matters'.
Factor 3: My stepfather is Italian and we have family in Italy... This headline usually breaks many ice surfaces. We go on talking about the Italian people, the freshness of the food, the cobblestone streets, mountain top cities, quality of the small vineyards, the sun of tuscany... oh gosh.. the list goes on and on... thanks John!
Factor 4: 'This is Danny's daughter'.... Never in my life did I imagine diameter of my father's social circle. Although now he is at the brink of turning 50, he's still known on Shanghai Tang..... AND Sanya.. AND beijing.. and im pretty sure Kumin.. I just have to get there to find out how easy life will get once they know my father's name. I guess this is just an example of the whole 'Guan Xi (connections)'.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
switzerland...
.. Apparently Americans Love Switzerland..
Let's go
http://www.myswitzerland.c
Let's go
http://www.myswitzerland.c
Who? Those Friends.....
A thought from stalking facebook too much
Talented: From Laguardia
Drunk, Smart, Tanned: From Bing
Hot, not-tanned(with the exception of elliot), sometimes naked: From UK
Young Asians from Europe: Beijing
Living the High Life: Shanghai
My life is so balanced.
Talented: From Laguardia
Drunk, Smart, Tanned: From Bing
Hot, not-tanned(with the exception of elliot), sometimes naked: From UK
Young Asians from Europe: Beijing
Living the High Life: Shanghai
My life is so balanced.
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